Chapter 4 More Ways to Combat Boredom

 

As I studied by last chapter, even more strategies to fight boredom came to my mind.  One way is to become a scientist about everything that makes you bored.  If you are standing in a line maybe at the post office, you may experience acute boredom.  One solution is to start looking around the interior of the office.  Ask yourself why the building is built the way it is.  Why are the displays put on the way it was designed.

 

If you are in line at the local Walmart store and you are bored out of your mind in line, look around as an anthropologist would.  Why is the store layout the way it is?  Why are the checkout aisles so far away from the exit of the store (the reason is statistically, it lessens shoplifting…as the shoplifter has to walk longer and longer from inside the store to the exit, the instance of shoplifting diminishes).  Why do they put such “impulse” items right next to the checkout register?

 

Why is it that superficial things like magazines that glorify superficial celebrities put on the prime “real estate” by the checkout counter.  What does it say about our society which glorifies youth, money, and power?

 

Another way to combat boredom is to dance and sing.  It is impossible that a person who is singing and dancing is bored.  What musical instrument did you enjoy as you are growing up?  Maybe it is time to take a few classes on the “Intro to Acoustic Guitar” or “Intro to Ballroom Dancing” sponsored by the local Lions Association.

 

As we mentioned in the last chapter, do something physical and with a goal.  Like a sport.  There is never a person fully engaged in a sporting activity that is bored.  Even seemingly boring activities like fishing is not boring to the participant.  We are physical creatures with bodies that need movement.  Find the sport most suited to your personality and get going!

 

A human mind MUST be challenged.  Maybe to stave off boredom you need the next Sudoko puzzle, the next Crossword Puzzle.  What is your favorite puzzle.  I recall when the Rubik’s Cube electrified the nation.  When you are fully engaged in such a mental puzzle, you cannot possibly be bored.  You may eventually stop the activity and move onto a new activity, but while engaged, you will be fully absorbed in the puzzle.

 

Everyone needs to eat…  Do you enjoy food?  How about learning how to cook something simple.  It is a natural and fun way to stave off a boring Sunday afternoon.  You can bring along friends and have a cookout.  Nothing is more pleasing than having friends and relative eat your food and congratulate you.  Much of the fighting off of boredom is right under your nose, you just have to look.

 

Get a pet.  One that you can handle of course.  There is no comparable joy that having a dog jump on you with enthusiasm as you come home from work.  Even a well maintained fish tank will do the job.  Just watching the fish as they calmly float through the water has a meditative peaceful experience.  Just the act of cleaning the water tank, changing the filter, vacuuming the debris on the bottom of the tank.  All give you the pleasure of taking care of something you love at a low cost to you.  Some may go even further and have/ adopt a child, but that is a very serious matter of course you must consider with gravity.

 

Get off the sofa, out of your bed.  Nothing breeds boredom like more boredom.  It is like a bottomless pit that gets more energy the deeper you get.  Boredom is one unique activity that is strange.  When you feel bored, you feel like lying down in your bed, closing the shutters, and putting on your earplugs, and lying still.  But that “solution” just makes you more bored!  Refrain from this booby trap.  The key is do NOT be passive.  Be active…  Always…be active.

 

Always look around to try something new.  There is no such thing as failure.  There is only a learning process that is unfolding.  Throughout human history, we NEED newness.  That is what drives society forward, and thus its individuals, forward.  Change up your routine as much as you can without sacrificing too much time.  Drive a different scenic route to work.  Maybe can a train to work one day (you may find it fun to be with others rather than being alone in your car, and you may save money on gas and insurance too).  Perhaps you can bicycle to work one day (you will get more energy and enjoy the scenery on top of making your body more healthy).

 

 

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About youngkim3000

I grew up in Virginia and went to a top tier high school, being so ambitious and wanting fame and fortune like the next kid. I received good grades and then I went off to the University of Chicago where I majored in Psychology and Economics. After a brief but successful "Wall Street" career, I realized that I was not happy and left thinking that a career in the medical field would satisfy me. Then, I did some post Bac work at Northwestern and UIC, and then ended up at UIC Medical School. The problem was I was not happy there either. The structure, the repetition, and lack of being able to be free and spontaneously creative really knocked me down. Having to be subject to constant subjective evaluations sucked my soul dry. As I sought another chapter in my life, then came the financial collapse of 2008-9 which destroyed the "nest egg" and saving that I had worked so hard to build after college--which I so "identified with". I was so depressed at the loss of career and the loss of money that I fell into self pity and a deep seated depression. For weeks on end, I could not even get out of bed. I went to many doctors who could not really help me. I took so much anti-depressant medication and also self medicated with alcohol to dull my mind. One day though, I went to the public library in Niles, IL, and picked up some books on "Self-Help". I figured what do I have to lose? I was already so depressed I could barely get through a day. I picked up books by Wayne Dyer (Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life), Deepak Chopra, Louis Hay, Ram Dass, Osho, and Eckhart Tolle (A New Earth), The Dalai Lama, and revisited my faith in Catholicism. I devoured so many books to unearth just why I was suffering so much. I learned so much about myself and realized that my deep suffering was actually a gift for me to discover myself. Simply put, those words in those books saved my life. I was taking so many drugs and my physical health was in serious jeopardy. I realized that I could not live with myself any longer, and I needed to be free. I realized...that it was my own thoughts that were making me so depressed, as was my own "life story" that I replayed over and over. I realized that my mind was busy creating negative thoughts. Thoughts are "things" and expand. I understood that you do not "normally" choose your thoughts. Just like the digestion of a meal, the mind automatically creates all kinds of thoughts whether you like it or not. Just like you do not "choose" to breathe with your lungs or "choose" to make urine from your kidneys, you "normally" do not "choose" your own thoughts. They just happen, just like digestion. And if you had a bad experience, your mind recreates the negative thoughts without your conscious consent but you are forced to relive them endless times per day. It is only through CONSCIOUS INTERVENTION that you can make your mind change course from recycling negative thoughts. This is just like your breathing. You breathe automatically, but you CAN choose to influence your breathing, you can hold your breath if you are going to dive deep in the water, or you can consciously "slow down" your breath if you are relaxing in meditation and prayer. Once I realized I did in fact have an ability to control my thoughts, I consciously redirected the thoughts to positive uplifting notions. I noted that I had built such a large ego that the collapse of it dragged me down in catastrophic fashion. A big ego is different from self esteem. Both were destroyed, but I learned to regain self esteem through positive affirmations and knowing that the negative thoughts are not reality. I was choosing definitively to live in the past via my repetitive thoughts. I was also choosing to live in an uncertain future that I painted with dreadful possibilities. I realized that if I live in the "now", the present moment, I really did not have any reason to be depressed at all. I discovered I really only live in the "now". The past and future are fictions. It is akin to a motorboat on the water on a lake. The "wake" that the boat produces is the past, my vision of the future is what I can see in front of me, but I really only exist ON the boat in the present moment. I was living my life only on the "wake" created many meters before. Soon, my self-pity slowly subsided as I learned to accept "what is" and not grasp for anything and everything that is valued by Society. I concurred that it was my own "expectations" not realized that were causing such waves of discontent. Once I dropped my self imposed sad "life story", my yesterdays, I came to my senses that there was no need to feel upset at all. That realization hit me like "a ton of bricks" and quickly lifted me out of the well, like a rope thrown down the dark walls of the deep well. I would like to share that it was only that single moment of enlightenment, a "satori" event that forever changed my life, but that was not so. It was a gradual climb out of the abyss (over about a year). I realized that my mind was like a superhighway of blazing thoughts that went through my mind over and over based on the recent past. While my "life story" was going great, I believed in those thoughts, and my ego grew such that I became arrogant and sometimes unkind. Then when my "life story" changed for the worse, I similarly believed in those new negative thoughts with the same passion (which hurt me so deeply throughout my waking hours). I noted to myself that this was why I craved so many "tranquilizers" and medicines that would halt my thoughts. I realized that I was drowning in my negative thoughts and that I was CHOOSING to believe in them. But I learned through focusing on positive affirmations, meditation and prayer, I did not need any more drugs to "halt" my mind from stabbing me to death. Through the filter of society's measure I had evaluated my own life, unable to fully realize that it was all a fiction that my mind had created. I was completely unable to live in the present before this profound awakening. My life had turned into a constant "replay" of the past, the anxiety of the uncertain future...and my destroyed ego. Because of my belief that my thoughts were the ultimate truth, I suffered so deeply... but needlessly. Once I changed the direction of my thoughts, everything changed. The way I looked at my own life changed. I realized that LIFE is not a long emergency where the one with the most toys at the end wins. I realized LIFE is something to be lived fully, and joyfully...not some series of problems to be solved. Once I realized these insights, I realized that I was the creation of my own depression. Although a devout Catholic, I am also deeply moved by the ideals of Buddhism. About Karma and "Dependent Arising"...both of which are also in the Bible (Galations 6, Do not be deceived, God will not be mocked, a person always reaps what they sow). And I was...for the better part of my life, a runaway train into disaster that I was blind to...that I had planted the seeds onto. Putting money, fame, accolades, trophies, and so forth as the ultimate end to my goals sowed the seeds of psychological calamity when the inevitable tides of change occurs in every life. A person who extols those superficial qualities dooms himself/herself to disaster. The only variable is "time". Would it take a long time to find yourself in a train wreck or a short time? It doesn't matter. What matters is how soon can you realize the truth of existence and your place in it...and rise above what Society tries to focus you to believe. Society always makes you compare yourself to others, Society never leaves you alone to just be yourself. You have to exert effort and unlearn what Society has poisoned you with. I am now doing various "work" (not holding down any soul sucking corporate job), teaching, making money through various income sources like buying items at rummage sales and reselling them through Craigslist, asking neighbors and doing work they need, trading stock options when my financial tools indicate that there is a good trade. I am not focused on any "ladder to climb" or any "prestigious career"...and I am so much happier and at peace. I'd rather be "waterboarded" that go back to Corporate America. I have also a solid equanimity, and i am OK with whatever happens, and thus accept what God and the Universe wish for me. I wish to share my newly found wisdom and hope that my story and my interpretation of my newly found contentment can benefit others and I also wish to hear similar stories of awakening. God Bless, thanks for reading my "profile" and leave me your stories of awakening. Outside somewhere is a field where all of us are the same, I cannot wait to see you there...Namaste...
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