One classic notion described in every wise book from the Koran, the Bible, and the I-Ching (Buddhism) is that things change and you have to be wise to it changing. Everything takes a form, and then it disintegrates and loses its form. Nothing stays. Like my old Biology Professor used to say, “Even atoms oxidize, in other words, lose their electrons” and “Everything oxidizes.” New things form, then break down, and other new things form. It is a continuous cycle.
Take your favorite glass that you use for your beer or other beverage. It was formed in some glass factory somewhere by someone from its elementary parts. Let’s say it broke one day. You again have a choice. You can either curse at whoever broke it (whether it is your wife or friend or yourself) or you can simply say “Oh well, and not “Oh God!” A person once told me you are not upset that the glass broke, you are upset because you could not imagine it breaking. Embrace the notion that everything falls apart and disappears. The problem with typical thinking is that they take for granted all the processes of something being built up. They only focus on things when they break down.
For example, you don’t shout out in glee when you turn the car keys in your car and it does start in the morning. Even though it started up just fine thousands of times in the past, you simply take it for granted, thinking it would never change. But the one day that it does not start, you curse and moan the makers of your car manufacturer or whoever used your car last, making sure you ruin your next present moments with your negative reaction at the moment.
If you embrace the idea that things break and things will spill, then you will never “Cry over split milk”. That is not to say that you won’t try to stop that from happening again, but rather your reaction will be passive, and not active. You won’t be surprised at the change. Always go back to the wisdom of nature to embrace how things will change. For example, in a forest, trees fall over and break all the time, either from a storm or from human intervention, or simply age.
None of the people, and certainly none of the trees, mourn this fact because it is part of the cycle and nature of things. Built into the mechanism of growth is breakdown, and once a person fathoms this and accepts this, the suffering that arises due to things breaking alleviates. This is not to say that if a dish breaks you won’t care, or that you won’t be more careful the next time, but it is about an acceptance of “what is.”