Since we live in an often insane world, note always the importance of the observer… In other words, the observer is just as important as that which is observed. If you can change your perspective, the problem can lessen in intensity. One interesting analogy I once recalled was how I had a beloved dog named Bonnie who I truly cherished. She would take these gigantic poops all over the yard, and it stunk! So to me, I thought…how gross and vile and smelly. But that was myself as the observer that made the event unpleasant. To another observer, like flies and dung beetles, the pile of stinking feces was like roses to a bumblebee. And then after a few weeks, I noticed how the grass around the poop would rise and grow so vibrant and strong a couple of weeks later. It was a natural fertilizer. So, you can notice how even a stinky situation to you is completely is joyful to someone/something else.
To illustrate another example, suppose you get fired from your job. The first knee jerk reaction will be one of suffering. You may think to yourself, “Oh God, I am a failure. I am no good at this… what is wrong with me? How will I pay my rent the next month? I suck… I am a loser… What will I tell my parents”… And so on. But that is egocentric thinking. You need always to take the bigger picture. It is your story of “I” or “me” that is producing such a negative experience. From the perspective of the company, they may be saving just enough money to support the business by letting you go. So in their perspective, the firing was a positive event. Suppose that the job was not good for you in the first place. Suppose that you had a job as an architect and you really did not enjoy your job. You felt stuck in your work, unable to quit on your own. Or suppose that what you really wanted to do with your life is something totally different. Then how will you know you are not skilled at being an architect? How will another door open? The only way is if you are fired. And how on earth will you get that new job as something you really are intended to do?
And suppose that your next job was something in the arts like screenwriting, and suppose you really enjoyed the new work. It allowed your creativity to flourish. Then… wasn’t getting fired a secret blessing? And then you can understand the wisdom that even a tragic situation is really a seed that is planted and grew and blossomed for your joy and renewal. You need to understand that one thing always leads to another for a reason that you may not be able to notice right away. Trust God and the universe. What is the evidence for this? Because you are experiencing it right now. Even the most random and insignificant thing that happens in your life can really be blessing in disguise.
Think of where you are now, and then think of how everything in your life may have changed because of one small detail, one small occurrence. This is not sugar coating a bitter pill. It is absolutely the truth. Once you really recognize this, the paradox of it, a hidden energy and peace you never knew existed will blossom inside you. And something that seems like a rough patch is just a stepping stone in your evolution as a mature and happy human being. Things just are… If you can only accept what “is”, and not reject things based on the way you think things ought to be, then serenity will come into your life. It is also just like a child who is given an origami paper to make a plane with. If the child’s favorite color is green, and the only piece of origami paper left in the notebook is red, and he/she tells himself/herself that it must be green, then suffering…and a temper tantrum, begins. Adults do this just as well, although they too are often blind as to when they are doing it.